Homeward Bound

Well. My friends. This has been an indescribable 7 months and 19 days. Two weeks ago Monday I moved out of "my" home in Beykoz and moved to a friends apartment in Taksim where I lived out of a suitcase for over a week. One week later I received the devastating news that I job I have been expecting to being in Italy was not available. So I looked into making a quick Visa run and finding some temporary post in the City at least until Christmas. But as of July 14th Turkey past a law prohibiting the renewal of Multiple Entry Tourist Visas. Now expats such as myself must leave the country for 90 days before we can get another Visa. That means 90 days in 90 days out (I'll be interested to see how this effects the educational system of the Country as most English Teachers seem to me to be Visa Runners such as myself). Faced with unemployment and a rapidly expiring Visa. I made the only practical decision I had left to me, bought a plane ticket and returned home to America.

On to my next big adventure?

While I will keep this blog open and suspect that from time to time I will read or remember something that I may post here--from now on I will be returning to my US blog. If you have enjoyed my anecdotes or incites please join me there and be apart of my search to discover the deeply American soul it too moving to the Great Portal of the East to discover I had.


http://vadamorse.blogspot.com/

Görüşürüz, Arkadaşlarim

Boat Trip--Mediterreanean Sea and the Ege Coast

Me and Selin, Day 1

The Beautiful coast off Bodrum

The cove where we anchored for the first 2 nights

Selin and Me: Straw hat Divas

Seconds later I was nursing a sore nose from the bucket tied to the end of that rope...

Ismail Kaptan, and his assistant, Arcan

The perfect end to the perfect post.

Doctors doctors Doctors...

She had the perfect teeth that only a cosmetic orthodontist's daughter can ever have. I was in the classiest and most tastefully--kind of--dentists office I've ever seen in my life. I was trying to distract myself from the truly traumatizing before and after photos of Turkish movie stars and commoners with the oil paintings on the wall which were truly fabulous--and were all actually his own work. The tasteful African artifacts, fossils, antiquated Greek Bust and collection of Meerschaum Pipes add to the ambiance of education and lovely personality.

There was only a couple flies in the ointment...

1. Being that there didn't appear to be any Diplomas or Certificates of Continuing Education dating after 1991
2. The Dental Sterilization Machine was on a counter in the Kitchen right next to a sink full of dirty dishes.

*     *     *

That evening, I sat in an embarrassingly squeaky overstuffed leather chair in the reception area of an Orthopedists waiting while my girls and their mother consulted with the bone specialist about some foot...back....bone problems they had--problems invisible to me (someone who has been seeing these childrens nude bodies everyday for 5 months).
    The older girl came out and informed me that she was going to start wearing a back brace at home. But not because she has spinal problems, or chronic pain. She is going to wear what sounds entirely Medieval to me something that will train her to sit with better posture (i don't know why they don't just use scarves to tie her to a chair like they did during the Victorian era.

Girne (Kyrenia) Cyprus

I went to the Northern coast of Cyprus on my very first Visa run last week. For those of you who don't know (people such as me only one week ago) Cyprus or kibris as it is called in Turkey is a small island nation off the southern coast of Turkey and western coast of Syria. The island has strong Greek and Turkish ties and is just one of the many issues that stands between those two countries. In 1974 the Turkish army invaded Cyprus claiming the northern third of the island as exclusive territory for the Turkish Cypriot minority on the island. Cyprus is divided into Turkish Northern Cyprus and Greek southern Cyprus to this day.

*     *     *
Having the fanciest solo dinner I've ever eaten to date...between courses right now so I decided it's time to start today's journal...

 An American --> eating Chinese --> speaking Turkish--> in a formerly Greek country --> off the coast of Arabia and Isreal 

     I decided I would just play it cool and see how it went...fail. I feel VERY uncomfortable, unfortunately my strange, paranoid need to appear cool, collected, and dignified demands that I pretend that I don't really want to throw my money on the elegant table cloth and run by staying even LONGER and drinking at least 3/4 a pot of what looks and tastes like hot water (but they tell me is Chinese tea) and only then make my graceful exit. 
    This week was made by a myriad of strange women and foreign men. The 1st was the kind lady with halitosis who sat next to me on the plane...

Day 1
 I landed in Ercan at 9:00am Tuesday morning. (Flight from Istanbul to Ercan lasts about 1:15min) Ercan is a VERY small airport and at that time, on that day, at this time of the year, the arrival terminal was pretty barren...My anxiety spiked as I realized I no plans, no knowledge and nowhere to go for 3 days. This was another great first. My first time going to a country with NO contacts. At least when I came to Turkey I was relatively sure there would be a driver at the airport to pick me up and take me to my new home. I had only gotten my plane ticket to come to Turkey about a day and a half before. Aside from my employer telling me that Girne was the city I should go to...and my own harried googling of cheap hostels in Girne moments before I left for the airport at dawn; I knew nothing. The wonderful Turkish woman with bad breath who (has lived in London for the last 26yrs) sitting next to me on the plane offered me a place to stay with her family...It was tempting but deciding I need to be buck up and be independent I regretfully declined...

The 2nd woman to make my Cyprus trip was the Turkish Japanese Teacher....

     The otobus from the airport to Girne, making a short stop in the town of Lefkosa, costs only 10 lira and is very nice (its a tour type bus with plenty of room for luggage, takes about 1hr). On the bus I sat next to a Japanese woman who has lived in Istanbul for 12 years as a language teacher. I speak very little Turkish and she spoke even less English...but with Tinglish and simple hand motions we were able to communicate very well. When we got off the bus at the city center of Kyrenia (Girne Merkezi) Kamiko took me under her belt and we wandered the streets, ancient cobbles, and dazzling seashore of Girne for 2 whole hours before we finally found an internet cafe so I could look up the address of a hostel. From there we parted ways and I was on my own once again...
   
The Final woman to make my holiday in Cyprus was my "roommate" in the Hostel Le Thu or "Lucy"...

     I managed to make my way to the only youth hostel I could find online (although I later learned that there were several others in the area) called "Cyprus Dorms". The front of the 750yr old three story brick building faces the Old Harbor, the most picturesque and charming quarter of Girne but is accessed through 2 doors on a winding little alley. Cyprus Dorms are quite spartan, but for the location, and only 8euros (16YTL) a night, I am not complaining! Inside the hostel I encountered a menagerie of people...from the Bangladesh expat who runs the place...to a 55yr old Canadian man looking to settle in Cyprus...the American Jew and Turkish Muslim couple who stayed up stairs and my "roommate" a 21yr old Vietnamese girl who is attending Girne American University...we were certainly a unique bunch. But everyone was incredible helpful and friendly. I felt at home and safe in Cyprus Dorms. I can't recommend it enough for that alone. (http://www.cyprusdorms.com/index.html)
     I took a 15 minute otobus ride and managed to make my way to a free beach where I sun bathed for 2 hrs and even got into the Akdeniz (Mediterreanean Sea) for the first time!

Day 2

     The 2nd day of my "Kibris Tatil" (Cyprus Holiday) 21yr old Vietnamese Lucy, 55yr old Canadian Fred, and 22yr old American yours truly toured Kyrenia Castle. My first real castle!!!!!

Which brings me to now...the evening of Day 2...having dinner at "The Dragon" the Chinese restaurant where I tracked down Lucy, who is working. Man 3/4 a pot of tea sure seems like a lot when you are drinking it from a tiny cup.... 

Later that night I went out with Lucy, and 3 of her coworkers from the Chinese Restaurant. Night Clubs in Girne not impressive on a Wednesday night. But just being with Lucy was fun.

*     *     *
Day 3
    "Excuse me!" I follow him up the slope, jogging to catch up "Excuse me, hey!" he turns "Are you looking for Cyprus Dorms? Come on follow me, I'll show you the way--its kinda hard to find. That's where I am staying!"
      His name was Ahmed, and he is German. I know I know. We spend the day together, first on the top deck of a tour boat we got a bargain on (where I got roasted!) and talked. Then we had a late lunch of Adana Kebab (my favorite--food from the Adana region of Turkey is always deliciously spicy!) and talked and laughed. Being with Ahmed is wonderfully refreshing. He has the Western perspective of a German and quite a unique sense of humor. His English is wonderful, and he is the first guy I have met since I moved here who isn't in awe of my Americaness and falling in love with me (something that gets old fast, let me tell you).
     Ahmed is about 3months into a 9month Middle Eastern/Eastern European backpacking trip. He is an ultimate backpacker. He has lost the exact count but estimates that he has been to 50+ countries already--most recently Northern Iraq. But on this particular day I was the guide. My 2 days experience in the town and grasp of Turkish leading me to lead him around, teach him a few survival phrases, and even interpret the menu for him. Love it. His next stop will be Istanbul for five days next week. We exchanged contact info and plan to meet again when he arrives.

     I walk Lucy to work as we eat popsciles and turn heads: the two pretty Vietnamese and American girls. Tearful hugs goodbye. Only 2 days aquantance and already best friends. Then it was time. My bus was leaving in 20 minutes back for the airport in Ercan. Daniel and Dilek stop me outside the Dorms for a few pictures, and hugs. Ahmed comes along--saying he wants to make sure I leave! At the bus stop, waiting to board, Fred shows up to bid me farewell. I could cry. less then 3 days and I feel like I am leaving real friends.

Did I do much site seeing? No
Did I waste most my time there? Yes
Was I a celeb? Totally
Did I love it? Yes
Will I go back? I sure hope so!

Kitty Cats and Old Wives Tales

After one week of swilling tepid, stale water from glass pitchers left sitting on the counter at all times I finally broke two days ago, marched to the freezer, pulled out a lone icetray and to the horror of all those who watched, dropped two beautiful, crystalline icecubes into my glass.

Oh sweet Nirvana.

With a combination of frantic gestures, concerned facial expressions, and Turkish baby talk my surrogate Anne (mother) Dondu tried to convey the message the drinking cold water would make me ill and probably--one would have to assume--kill me. I didn't even try to be gentle or polite in my refusal to believe and insistence that I would continue to sip on my icy potion of death. This is one myth I simply refuse to cater to. Sorry, Dondu Abla, on this one I am just not budging.

*     *     *

Ice cubes is just one in a string of cultural quirks I have been slowly but increasingly noting here in Turkey. Granted, I only have the two families I have interacted with as moulds, but the reactions of the many drivers, delivery boys, maids, and coaches I have interacted with lead me to suggest my family is representative of more moderate Turkish culture. Thus I am going to make the assinine mistake of assuming most Turks are even more superstitious.
     Western medicine has known for over one hundred years that it is bacteria and viruses that make you sick, not the cold. Yet still the family huddles in the house. And veritably swaddles the children for them to walk the 20 feet from stoop to bus (escorted--of course--by the very pretty young woman who comes to the door every morning whom I assume is some kind of bus driver's assistant)

Today I snapped again...

(30 minutes ago)

   I sat in the gaily painted folding chair Ayşa had gallantly set up for me in the back room that doubles as Döndü's bedroom (for the one night a week she stays here) and a laundry workroom, or as I like to think of it: "Ironland". Watching Döndü iron garment after garment after washcloth after wait! Tweety Bird panties?!?! I was simply forced to interrupt. "Underwear? You iron an eight year old's underwear!?!?" Döndü Abla just shrugged and smiled, moving on to a tiny pair of corduroy pants. (Apparently my outrage needed no translation). I finally did what I had been promising myself I would do soon: I began an epic rant. Nevermind the fact that Döndü speaks only Turkish and Ayşa could probably only understand about every 7th word I broke into a Solioquey about the joys of childhood and how the ironing of panties was a symbolic slaughtering of youth--Mr. Shakespear would be proud really would--then I lept from my chair snagged my now notorious holographic alien notebook and raced from the room with no explanation.
     I stalked desperatly to my computer loacted in the salon and quickly clicked a link to my newly discovered new best friend: Google Translator. There I ferevishly typed in the words:

-Children Play
-Outside
-Get dirty
-Climb
-Jump, (and Finally)
-Laugh

I then marched triumphantly back to Ironland, waving my notebook like a banner of victory. Giving an abbreviated but no less passionately disgruntled encore performance this time in Turkish I talked about how American children play outside and are expected to get dirty.

I ended it with a vague (but I feel eloquent) "...and Turkish children? No."

Drivers

I.N.D.E.P.E.N.D.E.N.T. do you know what that means?
     Because the Turks, apparently do not. It is apparent to me after only one week that Turkish children--especially girls--aren't nearly as autonomous as Americans. The girls have everything done for them. From zipping their coats to cutting their food. Well, ok, only the 8yr old needs help with her clothes, but the idea is, they are expected to do much less then the average American child. Where this sheltering is really apparent however, is in travelling.
   In this family we have anywhere from 1-3 drivers at our beck and call at all times. When the drivers pick up the girls for, say, gymnastics, they come to the door of the house, walk us out, open the car door, walk us in to gymnastics, sit for the whole two hours, help us in the car, and when we get home, once again lead us up the walk and wait until the maid answers the door. Juxtapose this with my little brother and sister who scarf down breakfast, yank on their back packs often forgetting their coats and tear out the door to the bus stop where they push and shove until the bus comes.
     Now you would think that the fact that they are being carefully accompanied by the Nanny who was imported all the way from the States for just this purpose would mean they don't need to necessarily dog the children's steps the 20 feet from the curb to the door. Especially in a tightly gated neighborhood like Beykoz Konaklari.
     You would think.

     I however, am chafing at the supervision. When I told the mother that I was hoping that I could have friday as my day off this week so that I could go out with the AuPair who lives with the girls' cousins who has been here for 5 months already she expressed worry about me going out on my own (even though I am going to be with the other nanny). That's very sweet. And it makes me feel like a beloved part of this home that they wory weather I am warm enough, have had enough to eat, and if I am safe riding a bus for 20 minutes until I meet up with the other AuPair but the truth is, I have been taking care of myself for a long time now. I think I can handle a little rain.



 And to think: My parents were afraid for my safety!

"Seni Seviyorum"

     I was told "I love you" today by a Turkish woman of indeterminate age. I was also invited to sit in the kitchen over a leisurely cup of tea with said woman and the other maid, both of whom I have been invited to call my "Abla", or big sister; a title which I am coming to learn holds a great amount of affection and deference to the Turkish people. Abla is perhaps my favorite word in the Turkish language...right after guzel (beautiful) and yemek (food/eat) that is.
     Another thing I like and need to practice is the "Turkish Blink" An exaggerated blink of the eye is the Turk's version of the head nod. I means 'yes' but it also seems to mean much more then that. 'I knowledge you'...it's like a double wink, or an extra long hug.

*     *     *

     Standing in the living oda of Yasemin's Babaanne (Paternal Grandmother) two days ago, I was struck dumb with wonder. Laid out before me was the most magnificent view of my life, the Fatih Sultan Mehmet Bridge across a milky turquoise Bosporus in the Foreground with the dogpiled buildings of Istanbul spilling all around it. There was even a cami (meaning Mosque, pronounced jah-mee) or two sprinkled in the mix, all cuddled under the most gently grey overcast sky I have ever seen.
     Yet my eyes were drawn time and again to the equally shocking display of opulence behind me. Shifting my perch on the canary brocade sofa I am met with a clash of gold, brass and real silver. LOTS of real silver. The nutty, chewy taste of my first Turkish Delight still making the acquaintance of my tongue, I fight the urge to be a gawky American and reach for the camera that should be hanging around my neck somewhere between my visor and my fanny pack. And here I thought our house further up the Bosporus was nice. This one has an elevator and a gatehouse complete with security attendant.
     One short elevator ride later I was ushered into the home of yet another Keceli family. There I watched 2 little girls ooh and ahh over a newborn baby, 2 little boys run wild, banging on toy pianos, and realized that for all the glam and all the psycho traffic, there are somethings that transcend language and timezone.
     I also made my second American contact, the Au Pair of the little terrors afore mentioned. I suspect she was even more relieved by the short moments of American conversation than I was.

Sabah Iki (Morning 2)

(This is from an email I sent my Anne (mom) early Thursday morning

 

Gunaydın--Good Morning!

     My cup is full. From the moment I arrived this family (and their many retainers) have made me feel like a celeb. The cook, Döndü, who is an older lady, is tickled pink everytime I use a Turkish word and expresses to me everytime I am in the kitchen how excited she is to learn some english as I learn Turkish at the same time.

     I spent all of yesterday making crafts, reading books, eating flavorful HEALTHY food, playing wii fit (ask justin what that is), watching Wizards of Waverly Place in Turkish (Tell Jordan I even watched an epısode of Hannah Montana for the first time), reading books and playing an itty-bitty guitar.
    But all day I was listening close and ask ask askimg questions. "Bu Teurkçe ne demek?" --What is the Turkish word for this?--The eldest daugter, Selın who is my best teacher and closest friend so far, praises me and marvels at my ability to speak. "You can read Turkish!" sure I can say it, I just don't know what I am saying! I am carrying my little alien notebook everywhere and wishing I had a bigger one. The girls--even down to little Yasemin all love to write their favorite words ın my notebook for me. So I now have all the colors, names for animals like horses and bees, weather, food, etc.

 

Well, I think thats about it right now. They all sleep until 10:30--thats rıght--10:30am now that ıts break so I have about another 2.5 hrs to sleep before Kahvaltı (a delicious breakfast of cheese, olives, tomatoes bread and tea) I think I will quick munch on a few more prunes and what I thınk are drıed fıgs, dates, and cherries; then head back up to my 3rd floor bedroom my kingsized bed, and the best part--the secret balcony I just discovered last night with an AMAZING view of Beykoz! 

 

I love you. I love the family. Tell them so. This is SUCH an adventure!

Gunaydın

I was brushing my teeth with my fınger (because I forgot my toothbrush in Michigan) in my third floor bathroom this mornıng when I heard it. I pulled open the strange mırror\window next to me only to discover a world that had magically been turned to winter over night. And through the stillness echoed the call to Salatu-I-Fajr, or morning prayer. I said to stuffed tıger: "Bangy, I don't think we're in America any more"

Rewind 18hrs< < <
     We exchanged emails and with one quıck hug promised to talk soon. He was a guy from Ney York here for a semester of study abroad, I was a graduate from Michigan suddenly wondering what I was actually here for and what the hell I had just gotten myself into. I think both of us realized that this was the last vestige of Amerıcan companionship we would have for some time. I went to the Visa booth and was so shocked at how easy and fast it was that I think I may have just stood staring at the girl behind the counter for a few minutes after she grabbed my 20 dollars, slapped the stamp in my passport and thanked me. Then I shuffled sheeplike through the "Passport" queue and without so much as a moment of eye contact with the agent I was in the country.
     So much for homeland security.
     Baggage collected I walked out the doors into a scene from a movie. Or the SAG awards. Dırectly outside the airport doors there was a dividing wall holding back a crowd of men (I know, funny metaphor for something I've never had to do in my life). Many of them holding signs. I paused for the pap to snap my picture, posed, molehill of bagage trailing when I spotted my sign: "Vada Horse" with the H and an M hurridly scribbled in.
     Meet Sami.
     Loaded into the "VIP Car" sitting in the front seat next to our driver it takes me only seconds to realize that Turkish driving ettiquite and American driving don't even belong to the same Phyllum. "It's rainıng" both my driver and later the father point out. As if the the total and universal disobeying of traffic laws, traffic lanes, and common sense is to be excused by the weather.
     Through a complex system of exaggerated pantomime, Turklish (self created term indıcating and basterdised mix of turkish and english) and writing in my holographic alien notebook, Sami and I soon dropped into a conversation about American NBA players and how many children were in our perspective families. It took only minutes for this 49yr old man to become my first friend in Turkey...

Washed, dressed ın pajamas and ready for bed hours later (after a whirlwind afternoon of unpacking, helpiıng the girls with homework and sampling Turkish dishes while both girls, the cleaning girl Ayşe and the older woman Döndü looked on and laughed at my apparently sad attempts to learn the Turkish names), I was in my room and gave into a few self indulgent tears.

Some things I learned today:
1. I never want to drive here. Ever.
2. Due to sıze, this city ıs going to be a lot harder to get around then I thought
2.5. Istanbul is beautiful and I love it already
3. The language is going to be a lot more of a barrier then I expected.

How it all Began...GreatAuPair.com

The first thing you need to know is that i have wanted a Nanny job for over three years. I have been actively looking since January of this year (09). Late last winter I created a profile on AuPair.com hoping to find a position in a French Speaking family in Switzerland...To make a long story short, I got a whole lot of nothing but disinterest and creepy scams. (never never NEVER wire money to ANYONE you don't know!) June to November was a constant rollercoaster of thinking I would be leaving for Switzerland, England or France, only to have it fail at the last minute. Finally I gave up and tired of being unemployed applied for a job in my neighborhood...

Just when it started to look like I was doomed to spend the rest of my life right here in Grand Rapids, Michigan (my own personal Hell) an old roommate suggested GreatAuPair.com. With very little hope, I skeptically created a profile on Tuesday. Wednesday morning I had 7 messages from families all over the EU, one of which was a family in Istanbul Turkey. As soon as I saw their pictures on their family profile I knew they were what I had been looking for. I had found "My Family".

That was last week.

The mother, Sebnem, and I then began to exchange almost daily emails. Today, we were finally able to connect and talk face to face using Skype. I was able to meet both the mother and father, and they were able to meet a few members of my family (including my VERY relieved Mom) through the wonder of the modern webcam.

The date is set. We shall be buying a plane ticket from Chicago, IL to Istanbul, Turkey for February 1, 2010!

Merry Christmas Eve to me and to you too.